HIF 45

Even After That

I continued to gaze out the window. The world was frozen white. The snow that had been falling relentlessly as if the sky had torn open just yesterday had stopped abruptly today, as if it were a lie.

Someone walked out, leaving a long trail of footprints. Golden hair, shining brightly in the morning sunlight, fluttered in the wind. That person stood before the frozen garden. Then, they stretched their hand out toward it.

The cold snow that had smothered the flower petals gradually began to melt. Within the white world, petals of various colors revealed their true hues.

‘He really only came out today.’

Park Yul hadn’t left the basement all day yesterday. I was curious what was in there that kept him, but everyone said they’d never been inside the basement, so they didn’t know.

– Why haven’t you gone in to see?

– Because Leader doesn’t want us to.

It was a concise answer, but it was reason enough.

I picked up the velvet box I had placed on the table. Now I had to go deliver this.

I went down to the first floor and opened the door with a creak. The scent of snow hit me. It was a fragrance so cold it stung the tip of my nose. The piled snow glittered under the winter sun. I approached Park Yul, who was standing in the middle of it all.

“Ah, Yi-han-ah. Did you sleep well?”

Park Yul, sensing my presence, turned his body toward me. A warm, spring-like breeze was blowing softly around Park Yul. It seemed he was using it to melt the snow.

“Yes. What about you, Yul?”

“I slept well too. A lot of snow piled up overnight.”

“That’s true. It fell all day yesterday.”

Park Yul nodded lightly. I wondered if I should ask this, then cautiously broached the subject.

“I heard you were in the basement all day yesterday, Yul. You probably didn’t even see the snow.”

“You’re curious about what I was doing in there.”

A voice tinged with laughter followed immediately. He was right. I hadn’t even gotten to the main point yet. Perhaps I was the type who made my intentions obvious. Or maybe Park Yul was just perceptive.

“Not now. I’ll tell you later.”

If Park Yul said that, I wouldn’t get an answer even if I asked further.

I held out the box I had brought to Park Yul. Park Yul opened the box and silently gazed at the fragment inside for a long time. Then he carefully tucked it into his embrace.

“Thank you.”

Park Yul tousled my hair as if praising me and continued.

“Yi-han-ah. Do you have the fragment you chose with you now?”

I took the fragment from my embrace and placed it in Park Yul’s hand. Park Yul held the fragment quietly, then opened his hand.

The fragment floated into the air. A small hole appeared at the top, and a long, thin string was threaded through it.

Park Yul took it in his hand. Then, slowly bowing his head toward me, he stretched out his hand. Suddenly, it seemed like I could smell the scent of flowers. Not from the garden beside us, but from right nearby.

Park Yul gently hung the fragment around my neck. The brushing touch of his hand felt scorchingly hot. The temperature was so vivid that the nape of my neck flushed warmly.

“Yul. Your hand… it’s hot.”

I thought I briefly heard the sound of a shallow intake of breath near my ear. Park Yul pulled his body away from me. Then, placing the fragment hanging around my neck onto my palm, he continued.

“I guess it’s from melting the snow.”

Park Yul calmly tapped the fragment resting on my hand with his fingertips. The fragment gradually shrank to a size suitable for wearing around the neck.

“You can change the size by tapping it three times.”

I met Park Yul’s gaze, which seemed to ask if I understood. I nodded. Looking at Park Yul’s brightly smiling face, words suddenly tumbled out without me thinking.

“Hyung. Will you give me the same gift next year too?”

“Yeah.”

“And the year after that?”

Park Yul nodded as if it were obvious. I thought about ending the conversation there, but then it occurred to me that if not now, there might not be another natural situation to ask.

I tried to make my voice as flat as possible, as if it were an insignificant question.

“And even after that?”

Park Yul looked at me quietly. Could we continue to be together even after the Hero’s term ends? I waited for an answer, tense, and Park Yul smiled with his eyes beautifully curved.

“I’ll still be here even after that.”

This time too, Park Yul seemed to have guessed what I wanted to ask.

Probably meaning he would stay in Ledeo. Hearing that answer, I somehow felt a little relieved.

“This is the first gift for Yi-han-ah.”

“Yes. Thank you, hyung.”

“Sure. Take good care of it.”

“I definitely will. But it’ll disappear next year, right?”

“Right. You heard about that.”

“Why make it disappear? You could just keep it as it is.”

Park Yul picked up the fragment resting on my hand. Then he slowly lifted the collar of my clothes. Even though I was wearing a thin layer underneath, the cold winter air rushed in.

My body shivered slightly from the chilly wind. Park Yul slipped the fragment inside my lifted collar. Then he smoothed my collar back down.

“What do you think the reason is, Yi-han-ah?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Then think about it a bit more and tell me.”

“Will you tell me about this later too?”

Park Yul lightly tapped my chest area with his hand. The fragment hanging around my neck swung near that spot and tapped against it with a hard touch.

“Yeah.”

Park Yul looked at me and smiled quietly. The pouring sunlight cascaded onto Park Yul. The surroundings shone brightly, making it seem blurry, like light scattering on the surface of water.

A breeze rustled by. I heard the sound of petals brushing against each other. I turned my head toward it. Unbeknownst to me, the snow had all melted, and droplets had formed on the petals.

“Shall we go in now? It’s cold.”

I nodded. The piled snow crunched under my feet as I took a step.

I looked up at Park Yul’s face as he walked beside me, matching my pace. Park Yul, sensing my gaze, turned his head toward me.

He was smiling with his eyes beautifully curved. As always.

◇

Several days had already passed since welcoming the new year. The weather was gradually easing.

After the day I delivered the gift to Park Yul, for a while, I only woke from sleep around the time the sun was high in the sky.

It was a few days ago. That day too, in the morning…, no. At lunchtime, my eyes snapped open, and the room was already dyed with yellow sunlight.

Lying still with a complicated feeling, I looked up at the ceiling. Then I realized there was a sound that had seeped into the quiet room as naturally as air. It was the sound of a pen tip calmly scratching against a notebook.

– Ha-gyeon hyung.

– …You’re awake.

Song Ha-gyun responded slowly, without showing any sign of surprise even though I had suddenly spoken. The sound of paper rustling as it was turned overlapped.

– Hyung, you didn’t go to the lab today.

– …Yeah.

– Weren’t you busy?

– …Not busy.

If words and actions differ, which should you believe? I was the type to believe actions. Seeing him doing something nonstop, Song Ha-gyun was undoubtedly busy. But there was something I really wanted to ask.

– Can I ask just one thing?

A creaking sound was heard. I turned my head toward the desk. Song Ha-gyun was sitting on the chair, his body turned toward me. Bright sunlight shone from behind Song Ha-gyun.

– Ask, everything.

I found myself nodding at that voice. Song Ha-gyun looked at me like that and turned his body back. The sound of turning pages continued.

Dust illuminated by the sunlight floated in the air. Watching the slowly swaying, shining specks, I opened my mouth.

– Aren’t there medicinal herbs that replenish stamina?

– There are.

Then, can I ask for some of that? Just as I was about to say that, Song Ha-gyun’s words slowly continued.

– …On the table.

I turned my head slightly to look at the table.

Glass bottles filled with purple liquid were densely placed. The white sticks inserted in them had already been faintly dyed. A subtle grassy scent spread from here.

– Which one among these is it?

– …The ones with round bottoms.

– They all have that…?

– Yeah.

Good grief. So the stamina borrowed from the medicinal herb’s effect was only this much.

– …It’s a mix of various ones. Why?

– I thought maybe I was waking up late because I lacked stamina.

– …You said it was your first time.

– Huh?

– Traveling far.

That was true. Although I hadn’t done anything in the Forest of the Fallen Night, compared to when I was at the temple, I had moved several times more.

– It’s natural, due to aftereffects. You need rest.

Hearing Song Ha-gyun say that, I somehow felt relieved. So it wasn’t something strange.

Of course, it wasn’t something to accept as entirely natural. Since I couldn’t keep being this exhausted every time I go somewhere, I needed to find a fundamental solution as soon as possible.

I pondered over it for several days like that, and then today, for some reason, I woke up early in the morning.

I don’t know how long it’s been since I greeted the clear blue sunlight. It was a good sign. Perhaps the aftereffects were gradually wearing off.

Even though it was early, the bed next to mine was empty. It seemed I still had a long way to go to match Song Ha-gyun’s diligence.

Then, Song Ha-gyun probably went to the lab, and Raen might not have woken up yet.

Park Yul… I’m not sure. Park Yul would usually bring lunch upstairs and wake me when I slept late, but from that, I couldn’t tell when Park Yul usually wakes up.

Min Joo-hyuk said he always wakes up early….

Knock knock.

Someone knocked on the door. A lively voice came from inside the room.

“Come in!”

I opened the door with a creak. A cool wind blew toward me. Min Joo-hyuk was standing by the window. The window was wide open.

“Oh, it’s Seon Yi-han. Has lunchtime already passed?”

“You…”

“Just kidding. Why did you wake up so early today? Aren’t you tired? Come in first.”

I vowed to show a diligent side to Min Joo-hyuk from now on. I stepped into the room.

Min Joo-hyuk’s room felt more organized than I expected. Outerwear, as if just taken out, was hanging on a chair.

“Min Joo-hyuk, are you planning to go out?”

“No. I already went out and came back.”

Min Joo-hyuk moved and picked up the outerwear. Soon, the clothes floated into the air, swaying and fluttering here and there. And in an instant, they straightened out neatly. A breeze brushed past my bangs.

Min Joo-hyuk hung the clothes inside the closet and continued.

“Too bad. If I had left a little later, we could have gone together.”

“Where did you go?”

“To an art supply store.”

Min Joo-hyuk brought a rustling paper bag toward me. Inside were three or four paints in round containers.

“Do you originally like drawing?”

“Huh? Did you know? Just as a hobby.”

I wondered if it was okay to say I wanted to see his drawings, but Min Joo-hyuk stared intently at my face. My reflection was captured in his blinking brown eyes.

“What? Do you have something to say?”

He was grinning. As if he knew what I was thinking.

Then, there was no need to hesitate. I opened my mouth without hesitation.

“I want to see.”