HIF 56

Because I Will Find It Eventually

I knelt on the ground. Placing my hands near my chest, I slowly regulated my breathing.

I stayed like that for a long time, completely still. Until I calmed down.

‘Good. I feel a bit better now.’

As expected, people need to think a little calmly. When you take a step back and look, there’s nothing in the world that feels overwhelming. The farther you get, the more trivial things seem.

Get a grip. I raised my arm and wiped my eyes. My vision cleared.

I sprang up from my spot. Rummaging through my pocket, the papers imbued with magic came out stiffly to my fingertips. From among them, I picked out and held the two spells I needed right now.

Ziiik.

I tore the papers all at once. A sharp sound pierced through the violet dawn air and shimmered.

My surroundings brightened. Simultaneously, my body slowly began to float. The spells contained in the papers I just tore were light magic and levitation magic.

Wind rustled softly around me. My field of vision gradually rose. The structure of this place slowly came into view.

“The destination… I decide.”

I enunciated each word clearly in the most distinct voice I could muster. The voice echoing in my head was gone now. I clenched my teeth tightly.

‘I need to go to the Temple.’

The answer is there. Sacrifice, offering… I don’t know about such things. I couldn’t remember anything. So I had to go. I had to go and find out.

Pondering over it now was meaningless. As of now, there was nothing I could know.

‘First, do what I can do now.’

I had to solve the immediate matter first. The reason I was summoned here was probably to show me that scene earlier. I didn’t want to stay here a moment longer. I wanted to escape.

As my body floated buoyantly, a cold breeze brushed my cheek. My mind gradually settled. Rising high enough that the things on the ground looked tiny, I could now clearly see.

‘It was a maze.’

It seemed that way. Paths crisscrossed here and there. The maze stretched far into the distance as far as the eye could see. No end was in sight.

‘Is that the center over there?’

Green vines were densely clustered in a wide cylindrical shape, coiled and rising higher than the other walls. It wasn’t far from here.

I moved towards it. I descended onto it and plopped down on the spot.

The vines touching my palms were slightly damp. Perhaps because it was dawn, dew seemed to have formed. The cold sensation grazing my fingertips finally made reality feel tangible.

As I was pondering how to get out and slowly regulating my breathing,

Ding.

A clear sound rang in my ear. My body flinched.

Penalty ‘Intermittent Hemoptysis’ will be maintained for a duration of ‘3 months’.

A new Quest Window appeared before that.

It was a short sentence that looked hastily scribbled. I stared at it quietly, then leaned back. Beyond the blue-glowing Status Window, the violet night sky spread out wide.

‘Since when did it give me a choice?’

It was absurd. As if reflecting my will when starting a quest at some point, ‘Accept’ and ‘Refuse’ were written.

No, thinking again, this wasn’t that meaning. It felt more like a nominal, one-more-time inquiry. As if assuming I would naturally refuse.

Haven’t you suffered enough until now? It’s a quest you can’t succeed anyway and you’ll only receive a penalty, wouldn’t it be okay to quit around now? It knows what I will choose.

Because the path is predetermined. Disguising it as kindness, it was urging me to quit.

“I will accept.”

I declared firmly. Yet, no notification that the quest was accepted appeared.

The Status Window before my eyes remained unchanged. As if it wouldn’t disappear until I gave the predetermined answer.

I couldn’t accept that. The path I walk, I decide. Where I head, I decide. I spat out defiantly.

“I will do anything I can do. So accept it.”

As soon as my words ended, the Status Window before my eyes flickered. The light shimmered erratically as if an error had occurred. Above the shaking Status Window, new letters sizzled into existence.

I quietly gazed at the Quest Window where tiny light particles seemed to scatter like something broken. Everything except the quest title was left blank.

As if it never intended to create it properly from the start.

Soon, the Quest Window before my eyes vanished on its own with a whoosh. Without even leaving an afterimage. Before my eyes where the light had gone out, the cold dawn sky spread out again.

‘Did it get properly accepted?’

I couldn’t even be sure of that. “Quest Window,” I said quietly, but it didn’t appear. I squeezed my eyes shut. I needed to organize my thoughts.

‘First, assuming the scene I saw is indeed from my childhood, I was a sacrifice.’

A sacrifice offered to a god. Thinking this far, my fingertips trembled momentarily. But now wasn’t the time for this. I clenched my fist tightly and composed myself.

‘I am a sacrifice, but the offering is not done by me.’

What does that mean? If I’m not the one being offered, then what meaning does being a sacrifice have? I couldn’t know this. I had to move on for now.

‘Azure Light.’

That must be divine power. And ‘absorbed’ meant there might be divine power within me now. When thinking of Azure Light, only one thing came to mind.

‘The System.’

Yes. That was the only thing. But if that is indeed divine power, why does it manifest in this way? Divine power is sacred. It doesn’t manifest in such a playful, game-like form.

So I couldn’t be certain about this part. There seemed to be a connection, but I shouldn’t jump to conclusions.

‘Why can’t I remember?’

No matter how much I thought, not a single memory from that age came to mind. That period of time was completely empty, as if carved out whole.

Perhaps the saying ‘you’ll know when the time comes’ meant that. The meaning of knowing later what you’ve forgotten now.

‘It doesn’t matter.’

First, I needed to go to the Temple, offer devout prayers to the god, and listen for the voice. The only place to hear a god’s voice would be the Temple, the place where the god is enshrined.

Now I had a sense of what I needed to do. Everything was sorted out.

Since I don’t know the detailed method to converse with a god, I first needed to ask Teacher. Of course, it probably wouldn’t be particularly difficult. I had already heard a god’s voice before.

Before coming of age at the Temple, one doesn’t offer formal prayers. Still, it’s normal to learn the procedures for conveying words to the god, but I didn’t receive the usual education at the Temple like the other children.

The Priests didn’t pay even a speck of attention to me, and Teacher was too busy to give me detailed teachings.

‘…Teacher.’

Did Teacher also know I was a sacrifice? No, he must have known. If so, then all the gazes Teacher directed at me… were they all just pity?

Having that thought, all strength drained from my body. It felt as if all willpower suddenly evaporated. Nothing seemed to matter. It was as if blood drained away, leaving only an empty shell.

I felt nothing. I was dazed. I felt a bit hollow. All the time I endured there.

Everything before my eyes was dark. Of course. My eyes were closed. But even if I opened them, what would change? I don’t know. If nothing changes, then just like this…

Clap!

Then, a small clapping sound was heard from above. My eyes snapped open.

From the violet sky, a bright yellow halo of light was slowly descending. It was exactly like a falling star.

‘Who is it?’

Inside it, someone’s silhouette seemed to sway. The halo of light came straight towards me. Soon, I felt the presence of someone landing softly beside me.

The light faded a little. I felt a hand gently brushing up the bangs of my hair as I lay still. A voice, soft as if it would melt, brushed past my ear.

“Yi-han-ah.”

Park Yul was looking down at me. His eyes were curved into a gentle smile.

“Here you were. I looked for you for a long time.”

“…How did you find me?”

“Where is there a place your hyung can’t go?”

It wasn’t an answer that qualified as one. How did he really find me? I quietly looked up at Park Yul. Park Yul gently brushed the corner of my eye.

“Your eyes are swollen again this time.”

“…It must be because it’s dawn.”

Park Yul quietly covered my eyes with his hand. Warm darkness filled my vision. Park Yul’s gentle voice continued.

“Are you sleepy?”

“That’s not it.”

“Then were you scared alone?”

“That’s not it either. Just…”

I had nothing particular to add. I quietly closed my mouth. Park Yul slowly moved the palm he had placed over my eyes and gently patted my forehead.

“Did you know this time that hyung would come?”

“……”

It also seemed like I faintly heard a small voice, muttered as if to himself, wondering when Yi-han would be the first to say he had been waiting.

The touch that carefully met and left my forehead created a regular rhythm. Exactly like a calm, quiet heartbeat. My body, which had felt utterly empty, gradually felt filled with warmth.

“Thank you for coming.”

“Yeah. I was worried it might be dangerous. I’m glad you’re safe.”

Park Yul softly reached his hand over my lying body. Then, he carefully brushed off the blue flower blossoms that had settled and piled on my clothes.

“Did you look for me for a long time?”

Thinking about it, it was already dawn. Time had flown by. For me, it was just closing and opening my eyes briefly, but it wouldn’t have been like that for Park Yul. Surely he hadn’t been searching all day?

“The time spent searching always feels long.”

Park Yul enveloped both my hands. Then he gently sat me up.

“But if I found you in the end, then things like that seem to stop mattering. Right?”

Park Yul met my gaze and smiled brightly. A single blue flower blossom landed on Park Yul’s head.

I reached out my hand. Park Yul followed my fingertip with his gaze. I grasped the flower blossom that was faintly swaying on Park Yul’s golden hair, which seemed to glow even in the darkness.

The flower touching my palm felt strangely prickly. Even though clearly nothing had changed. I clenched my fist tightly.

“Yul, you said you would wait until I spoke first.”

“Yeah.”

“So even now, you’re not asking anything? Things like why I’m here.”

“You didn’t ask more about how hyung found you either.”

Park Yul’s voice followed immediately, as if it were natural. However, there was a valid reason why I didn’t ask Park Yul more.

“You came for me. That’s enough for me.”

The fact that I was no longer alone here was more than enough for me. I was curious about how he came, but it wasn’t something to press if Park Yul didn’t say.

“But Yul, you’re not like that, are you? You…”

You… don’t you have no need to find me every time without asking me anything? I tried to ask that, but my voice wouldn’t come out further.

Park Yul quietly held me in his light green eyes.